My little sister Elise and I are 2 ½ years apart in age.
And as the youngest of six, our musical journey basically began together.
Aside from a few instances, such as…
…dancing like maniacs to Zorba the Greek from a Herb Alpert album in our parents’ collection…
…it was by and large the music of our older siblings that provided us with our earliest musical memories.
Whether it was jumping up and down on our beds to old 45s that they had left behind or watching our sisters do a pantomime to Cat Stevens’ cryptic Moon Shadow…
…or arranging our stuffed animals to sing Happy Jack by The Who: The joy, wonder, and intrigue of music was embedded in our souls from those days forward.
Eventually, we discovered the hallowed ground of our brother Greg’s peach crates full of albums.
Greg was already an adult. Setting foot into his room was like entering a fascinating foreign land full of curiosities.
There was the red lava lamp, the jar of liqueur-flavored hard candy (we knew it was off limits, but we tried it)
And: the distinct, overpowering scent of Brut 33 cologne.
When we dared to venture in, just thumbing through those records with their mystical, enchanting cover art became an otherworldly experience.
Though all of our siblings’ musical proclivities seeped into our bloodstream, everything from Motown to rock to singer/songwriter to disco, those peach crates seemed to be the beacon in the night, guiding us to our rightful place on our musical journey.
When we would strike out on our own and start getting into something such as, let’s say, Barry Manilow Live, which we absolutely adored, Greg was right there, letting us know in no uncertain terms that we had strayed from the path.
As we got older, both Elise and I began to carve our own musical identity.
After a short-lived, manic Shaun Cassidy phase, the first album I remember Elise procuring was Paradise Theater by Styx.
I stared, mesmerized at the cover, and asked aloud how the band came up with the idea of naming the album after an old theater. Elise quickly responded with:
“Because Dennis DeYoung is a genius, that’s how.”
The rock bands she initially embraced such as Styx, REO Speedwagon, Survivor, and Journey were not radical choices, as Greg owned albums by these bands, or at the very least was into them.
When she came home with a Van Halen album, things got shaken up a bit.
Greg immediately frowned upon their cover of Pretty Woman, surmising that Roy Orbison would have to be flat broke and awfully desperate to allow such a travesty.
Other than some of the harder stuff, Elise didn’t veer that far off course from the rest of us, until she was well into high school.
She went from what could be considered to be a conventional 80s suburban teen to someone altogether different.
She began dating a punk rocker, an actual punk rocker with a mohawk. I didn’t even know you could find one of those in our town. (Word had it that he eventually became a Buddhist monk.) Gone was the feathered hair, replaced by a shorter do. Gone were the rock and roll records, replaced by bands unfamiliar to any of us.
Greg and I had a field day with Echo and The Bunnymen.
We thought the name was just ridiculous, and we told her the singer sounded like Neil Diamond.
She in turn would call into question the Christian Rock bands, like Petra, that I would blast on the stereo. Fair enough. When I reminded her that she used to love Van Halen, she vehemently denied it.
We were at an impasse.
Our musical experience was no longer shared and worse still, we had become combative
But a funny thing happened:
I actually liked some of what I was hearing from her collection.
One of the first things to catch my ear was Love My Way by the Psychedelic Furs. The spacy synths, the cool marimba line, and Richard Butler’s raspy vocal delivered in a thick British accent all captivated me.
I still love hearing it.
I was also drawn to the minimalism of Kraftwerk’s Computer World. In particular, I found the track Computer Love, all seven minutes+ of it, irresistibly hypnotic.
It was amazing how it managed to sound mechanical and detached – and yet utterly human and vulnerable at the same time.
Once Elise saw that I was warming up to some of her records, she began playing things for me she thought I might like:
Such as The Cure’s The Love Cats, with its jazzy acoustic bass line and barroom piano sounds.
Direct hit.
As she began exploring the Goth world, darker sounds began emanating more frequently from her room, such as a Ministry 7” or Bela Lugosi Is Dead by Bauhaus. Being into the Moody Blues, I remember thinking, “Oh, it’s like ‘Timothy Leary’s dead’- but a totally different person.”
She began spending more time in the city (Chicago).
She and her friend Susie would hang out at a shadowy all-ages club called Medusa’s that had a very underground vibe.
I was never there, but I’m picturing everyone wearing black and dancing to industrial and goth music and I think that’s pretty darn close.
Elise eventually fulfilled her destiny and moved to the city in the late 80s, and we had less and less contact.
I remained firmly rooted in the suburbs and delved full-on into my faith, whereas she had decidedly pulled away from both of those. I would come to her apartment to get my hair cut (no one has ever gotten my hair like she did), but it was as if we were from different worlds and had nothing in common.
Music was a dead end.
I would look at her cassette collection and see names like Skinny Puppy, and just feel a bit frightened and worried.
When I tried to talk to her about anything, I made no attempt to gain any perspective on where she was coming from, and only saw things from my point of view, which was very rigid at the time. I undoubtedly came off as preachy and judgmental, which could only serve to drive us further apart.
Once again, music stepped in, and it was Elise making the overture.
Sometime in the very early 90s, she began giving me mixtapes of some of the music she was currently into, such as house, acid-house, ambient, trip hop, neo-funk and Latin jazz. I loved pretty much all of it and played some of those tapes for years afterward.
I was exposed to artists like Massive Attack, Brand New Heavies, the Orb, and Mr. Fingers.
As I was starting to expand past my CCM (Christian Contemporary Music) leanings, those tapes helped me forge ahead into new sonic territory and formed a good chunk of my musical taste in that chapter of my life.
And it goes without saying that I am forever indebted to her for introducing me to the music of Tito Puente.
That was monumental.
As the years progressed, Elise and I both went through personal growth and change, and gradually became closer.
Music has remained a key part of that bond. Though our tastes have sometimes diverged, we always find our way back to that shared love of music that goes back to jumping up and down on our beds to those 45s.
At any time:
We’re really just one car radio memory…
… one Elton John-Kiki Dee karaoke duet…
…one peach crate album away from being vaulted right back to where it all started.
That’s a pretty cool thing to have.
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Great tale. Your sibling and musical bonds shine brightly, rb. I’m guessing western suburbs?
Thank you, cst. Yes, NW burbs, to be precise!
McGreevy’s and WaxTrax anyone?
Lovely story, rb.
The basic setup reminds me of my twin brother and I. We too were the youngest siblings, mostly shaped by the music of our older siblings and the radio. And then high school happened, and at some point we started to sort into different social groups, and leaned into different musical discoveries.
We had both been into goth and industrial, though I leaned harder into punk. And soon enough I was sneaking off to rave parties and really getting into the electronic sounds there. Whereas he had a brief anti-hipster period, going into boy bands and Shania Twain!
We still have distinct preferences, but there’s plenty we still share. For what it’s worth, I think I have become even more open than he to cheesy pop. Thankfully, we can still bond over some Skinny Puppy. 😀
I like this. And nice Skinny Puppy tie-in! I no longer fear them, by the way.
You and your brother would have probably fit right in at Medusa’s, I’m guessing.
We never went all the way on appearance, but close enough I guess. My hair in high school was taken from The Cramps’ Lux Interior, who did serve as a stylistic influence for later goth looks.
I love this. Sibling relationships ebb and flow, and you’ve detailed that nicely.
And the haircutting bit reminds me of my housemate Nancy, who would cut my hair while talking on the phone. My haircut would look like her conversation, but I was in a punk band, so lopsided was OK.
My sister was five years older than me, and we were the only two until my brother came along when I was ten. When I was very young, I listened only to her music, big on sweet pop, harmonies, and the occasional cute boy. My first break was the first time that I bought a record of my own, “Riders on the Storm.” She thought it was way too dark. I loved it for being way too dark. My fascination for the darker side of everything, literature, music, film, etc. has lasted, but I can still listen to sweet pop on occasion.
I have been listening to some of it for the last few days. I wrote once on the mothership about having played all of the Monkees’ albums to her as she was in hospice, and the smile that they brought to her face. She wasn’t communicating much by then, but I knew she was enjoying the music. I usually dig out a “Best of” playlist around this time every year in honor of her and cry while I listen. That musical bond between siblings is strong, and I was lucky to have it.
Beautiful story!!!!
Hello there community. This is the afore mentioned Elise, proud sister to RollerBoogie. I loved this story about our shared history by my amazing brother! I read all of his stories, but this one prompted me to finally make an account 🙂 I am happy to be here
Welcome! Glad to see another talented member of the boogie family joining the fun.
Can we interest you in a fashionable avatar?
Yay! So glad to see you here, li’l sis! This one was a long time in the making and I have a feeling there are more chapters to come! One can only hope!
Hi Elise, and welcome! Are you still available for haircuts? I’m looking a little shaggy and I’ve lost touch with my old housemate.
That’s going to be a bit of a drive for you v-dog.
Glad to have you with us!
Siblings in the house!
Great story. The power of music to bring people together.
My sister is 3 years older. There was a brief period when I would borrow her cassettes; INXS Kick and U2 Rattle And Hum amongst them but it was a mixtape that one of her friends made her with the cream of late 80s British indie that had the biggest influence. Listening to that things fell into place with Stone Roses and Happy Mondays. I probably played that tape more than she did.
Into the 90s she got heavily into the rave scene and headed off to London and then 3 years of hedonism in Ibiza. Which was educational in other ways when I visited. These days her life is a lot more sedate and she’s so far from pop culture that just a couple of years ago she’d never heard of Taylor Swift.
There’ll always be a strong bond but when it comes to music we’re a long way apart now.
Yes, that bond will always be there no matter where life takes you and it sounds like it’s taken both of you to some interesting places!
Aside from the excellent prose, one other thing stood out for me today and had me staring for a minute before I moved on.
That Who poster is amazing.
They’ve made Keith look like the normal one. John would be joining him except his eyes are rolling into the back of his head. Pete looks raptor like with mesmeric eyes. And then there’s Roger who looks like some malevolent demon.
Perhaps it was designed to terrify and ward off wary parents that this British invasion was here to steal the souls of America’s youth.
Y’know, one day, Tito Puente will be dead, and you’ll say, “Oh, yes, I’ve been listening to his work for years.”
My sister is seven years younger than me. She credits me for most of her musical taste, which is strange because I find most of what she listens to dreadful. She really likes hair metal and continually searches out things that sound like that.
That’s actually pretty awesome. If she was in middle school or high school around the mid to late 80s, there is probably no cure for her love of hair metal. Once it gets in the bloodstream, it’s hard to extract.
I have one younger sister by 2.5 years. I was the musical fanatic in the family, but she had her own little collection as well. Mostly pop music. She went through a Monkees phase when they came back in the 80s. By the time I was going into college and was either looking only backwards in pop music or listening to country, she was mixing some rap in with her collection. I had no use for that. I ended up with most of her record collection (since she never had her own record player).
Just last month, she, her husband and two kids stopped by on their move from Seattle to NC. (Fayetteville). Her extremely introverted 14 year old son is now totally into “Weird” Al Yankovic. I had to part with two of her albums that I had in my possession since 1988…Yankovic’s first two records. But since my nephew loved getting them, I had absolutely no problem giving them away. I’m glad they are well loved.
Good uncle.
I second that!
I’m Greg RB’s older brother! I’m the one responsible for corrupting my two younger siblings. Haha! Seriously, I’m happy my peach crates brought so much joy to them. In my opinion this was one of your best articles, RB! I really enjoyed reading how you and Elise bonded through music. Some of it I remembered, but some of it I had forgotten about.
Welcome, Greg! It’s getting to be a family reunion around here. I like it.
Thanks, bro. It’s always nice to see you here! I’m glad you enjoyed the article. And I will be coming over to raid those peach crates soon, now that I have a record player.
I look forward to it Bro!
Welcome, welcome!
Lovely post. I grew up as an only child, but I did have half-siblings who were already adults when I was born. My sister introduced me to some music (The Figgs come to mind immediately), but her bigger influence on me came from occasionally being around her and her world in NYC. She was in a minorly-successful band, started her own fashion brand, her partner had a modern furniture store and collected tribal art. It was all huge, eye-opening stuff for a young teen from rural south Jersey. I visited once when I was a freshman in high school and mentioned something about dying my hair, so she bleached it for me, we went out to dinner during my couple hours as a blond, and then died it blue later that night (it didn’t turn out that well, but a defining moment for me trying to discover my own self). So, big credit to her for helping to open up my world.
Your sister sounds awesome. Sounds like we have some sister parallels, though my sister never dyed me hair, though if I had asked her to…