Fantasy Number Ones:

The Series Finale: The 1980s

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In the 1980s, the discrepancies between chart toppers on Billboard and its biggest competitor, Cash Box, were more manageable than the previous decade. 

There were only 42 total versus nearly 100 for the 1970s.

With that amount, this third installment of Fantasy Number Ones should be a breeze to read and play along.

As I did with my first and second installments in this series, I list the CashBox-only number ones yearly and pick up to three of them to swap out with Billboard number ones of that same year.

It’s fun to do, and I’m sure your picks will differ from mine…. Or maybe not?

Anyway, here we go. All peaked at Number Two on the Hot 100 unless otherwise noted.


1980

Kenny Rogers
Coward Of The County (peaked at 3)

Smokey Robinson
Cruisin’ (peaked at 4)

Dan Fogelberg
Longer

Bette Midler
The Rose (peaked at 3)

The S.O.S. Band
Take Your Time (peaked at 3)

Stevie Wonder
Master Blaster (peaked at 5)

Smokey Robinson was so smooth with Cruisin’, arguably his best work ever. As a tribute to Bob Marley’s reggae music, Master Blaster is a perfect companion to what Stevie  Wonder did for Duke Ellington’s sound in Sir Duke. Since Midler once said, “’The Rose:’ The one song that didn’t come back and bite me in the ass!” I’ll take pick that too. I’m not too keen on the rest.

Cruisin’, Master Blaster and The Rose take the fantasy place atop the Hot 100 over Do That To Me One More Time by the Captain and Tennille, Sailing by Christopher Cross and Lady by Kenny Rogers.


1981

John Lennon
Woman

Smokey Robinson
Being With You

Oak Ridge Boys
Elvira (peaked at 5)

Joey Scarbury
Theme From “The Greatest American Hero”

Hoo boy… Elvira is an irritating novelty. Some may like the Theme From “The Greatest American Hero,” but like the series it’s from, its impact was ephemeral. I wouldn’t rank it among even my Top 20 TV Theme Songs. 

And as much as admire John Lennon and Smokey Robinson, these songs aren’t among the top tier of their work. Sorry: but I see nothing worth changing here.


1982

Journey
Open Arms

Stevie Wonder
That Girl (peaked at 4)

John Cougar
Hurts So Good

Laura Branigan
Gloria

I’m fine with approving Open Arms, Hurt So Good and Gloria, especially since Journey and Laura Branigan never got to number 1 on the Hot 100. I’ll take that trio over Chariots of Fire by Vangelis, Ebony and Ivory by Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder, and Truly by Lionel Richie.


1983

Culture Club
Do You Really Want To Hurt Me 

Styx
Mr. Roboto (peaked at 3)

Eddy Grant
Electric Avenue

Taco
Puttin’ On The Ritz (peaked at 4)

Men Without Hats
The Safety Dance (peaked at 3)

Duran Duran
Union Of The Snake (peaked at 3)

Ugh, this is novelty heavy. Only Do You Really Want To Hurt Me and Electric Avenue are quality hits. They stand out strongly than the rest here. I’ll gladly have them replace Maniac by Michael Sembello and Tell Her About It by Billy Joel anywhere anytime.


1984

Nena
99 Luftballoons 

Cyndi Lauper
Girls Just Want To Have Fun

Bruce Springsteen
Dancing In The Dark

Prince
Purple Rain

Chaka Khan
I Feel For You (peaked at 3)

Duran Duran
The Wild Boys

This is a year where I regret that I have only three picks. All of these except The Wild Boys would be great chart toppers at any time, so some tough decisions must be made. 

Eliminating 99 Luftballoons for its one-hit wonder status leaves Girls Just Want To Have Fun, Dancing In The Dark, Purple Rain and I Feel for You. Which means one must go. Oh, man ….

OK: sorry, Bruce. But I’m going with Girls Just Want To Have Fun, Purple Rain and I Feel for You. We’ll say goodbye to Hello (heh heh!) by Lionel Richie, Ghostbusters by Ray Parker Jr. and I Just Called to Say I Love You by Stevie Wonder.


1985

Philip Bailey & Phil Collins
Easy Lover 

Madonna
Material Girl 

Prince
Raspberry Beret

Take it from someone who was there: there was plenty of Phil Bailey, Madonna and Prince on the radio in 1985. Even though it might be overkill, I do think Easy Lover and Material Girl have held up well enough to merit a number one spot, Raspberry Beret not so much.

The former two will assume the spots held by Can’t Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon and Separate Lives by Marilyn Martin and, uh … Phil Collins.


1986

Billy Ocean
When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going

Van Halen
Why Can’t This Be Love (peaked at 3)

Tina Turner
Typical Male

Wang Chung
Everybody Have Fun Tonight

I’m not sure what it means to “Wang Chung tonight.” But the song is so infectious that I’m willing to give it the top slot. The rest don’t merit that distinction to me. Let’s swap Everybody Have Fun Tonight with There’ll Be Sad Songs (To Make You Cry) by Billy Ocean. (Hey, he’ll still have other number ones, OK?)

There were no differences between Billboard and Cash Box number ones in 1987. So, onto …


1988

Pet Shop Boys & Dusty Springfield
What Have I Done To Deserve This?

Def Leppard
Pour Some Sugar On Me

Both of these can claim a number one in my opinion. Even if they’re not up to West End Girls, Son of a Preacher Man or Love Bites. Give me them over Could’ve Been by Tiffany and Baby, I Love Your Way/Freebird Medley by Will To Power.


1989

Taylor Dayne
Don’t Rush Me

Milli Vanilli
Girl You Know It’s True

Jody Watley
Real Love

Madonna
Express Yourself 

Madonna
Cherish 

Tears For Fears
Sowing The Seeds Of Love

Paula Abdul
(It’s Just) The Way That You Love Me (peaked at 3)

Except for Jody Watley, all of these were Billboard chart toppers. While I’d like to grant her that status, Real Love isn’t quite a real Number One for me. Taylor Dayne, Tears for Fears and Paula Abdul have done better, and of course Milli Vanilli is a joke.

That leaves two numbers from Madonna. Cherish is just cutesy, but Express Yourself is anthemic and obviously influenced Born This Way by Lady Gaga. I’ll switch it with When I See You Smile by Bad English.


This ends this series for me.

Because:

In 1992, Cash Box announced:

Interrupting Whitney’s Houston run at the top with I Will Always Love You?

The Letter by Wayne Newton.

Wayne’s album cut was receiving very little airplay on any contemporary hits radio station.

Many thought this was blatant chart manipulation. Cash Box’s reputation suffered as a result, no doubt contributing to its disappearance in 1996.

Kind of a downer for a fun contest like this.

But hey, if you feel that The Letter is better than Whitney’s song or something else that topped the Cash Box chart in 1992, be my guest…

…and write your column about Fantasy Number Ones…

… for the 1990s!

I’ll be happy to participate.

Let the author know that you liked their article with a “Green Thumb” Upvote! 

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cstolliver
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July 11, 2023 8:34 am

This one was easier for me to follow the rules and stick to a 3-switch maximum. Like you, I struggle in 1984 but 1989 was tough, too.

1980: Cruisin’ and The Rose can take out Woman in Love (sorry, Babs, but you’ve had better No. 1s) and Sailing. Bix would not approve, but I’d sub out Funkytown for Take Your Time (Do It Right).

1981: If giving Joey Scarbury one week in the sun meant ejecting “Physical” from the top, I’ll do it.

1982: I’ll co-sign your choices for swaps there.

1983: Do You Really Want to Hurt Me can take out … hmm … I guess Tell Her About It, though I wouldn’t be sad to never hear Every Breath You Take again.

1984: Dancing in the Dark, Purple Rain and I Feel for You can eject Karma Chameleon (especially if Do You Really … gets the spot in ‘83), Hello and Ghostbusters.

1985: Bye, REO; hello, Philip and Phil. Easiest swap yet.

1986: I actually preferred Why Can’t This Be Love to Jump, but crossing years is a no-no, so let’s drop Stuck With You (Huey and the News had easily a half-dozen Top 10s I’d rather have seen at the top).

1988: Pet Shop Boys and Dusty over Will to Power is the second-easiest decision.

1989: Milli Vanilli may have been a joke, but Girl You Know It’s True easily overtakes its follow-ups, so I’ll pick Girl, I’m Gonna Miss You as the song that goes. As for the others, Express Yourself and Sowing the Seeds of Love can take out Batdance and When I See You Smile. (If I blew off the rules I’d pick It’s Just the Way That You Love Me over Cold Hearted, but I’ll play fair this week.) 😁

I’ve never heard that Wayne Newton song. Bet I’m not missing anything.

LinkCrawford
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July 11, 2023 10:26 am

Here we go!

1980 – “The Rose” by Bette Midler replaces “A Woman in Love” by Barbara Streisand”
-“Longer” by Dan Fogelberg replaces “Lady” by Kenny Rogers

1981 – “Woman” by John Lennon replaces “The One that You Love” by Air Supply
-“Being With You” by Smokey Robinson (and any other song) replaces “Endless Love” by Diana Richie and Lionel Ross
-“Elvira” by the Oak Ridge Boys replaces “Physical” by Olivia Newton-John. Everyday.

1982 – “Open Arms” by Journey replaces “Don’t You Want Me” by the Human League. (a much beloved song, but not by me)
-“Gloria” by Laura Brannigan replaces “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor

1983 The toughest year! So many good choices!
-“Do You Really Want To Hurt Me” by Culture Club replaces “Baby Come to Me” by Patti Austin and James Ingram
-“Electric Avenue” by Eddy Grant replaces “Come On Eileen” by Dexy’s Midnight Runners
-“Puttin on the Ritz” by Taco replaces “Flashdance…What a Feeling” by Irene Cara

1984 – “99 Luftballons” by Nena replaces “When Doves Cry” by Prince (hey…this is MY chart)
-“Dancing in the Dark” by Bruce Springsteen replaces “What’s Love Got To Do With It” by Tina Turner
-“I Feel For You” by Chaka Khan replaces anything, but I’ll choose “Missing You” by John Waite

1985 -“Easy Lover” by Phillip Bailey and Phil Collins replaces “I Want to Know What Whining Is” by Foreigner
-“Material Girl” by Madonna replaces “Oh Sheila” by Ready for the World
-“Raspberry Beret” by Prince replaces “Heaven” by Bryan Adams

1986 -“Everybody Have Fun Tonight” by Wang Chung replaces “You Give Love a Bad Name” by Bob Jovi

1988 – “What Have I Done To Deserve This” by Pet Shop Boys and Dusty Springfield replaces “Where Do Broken Hearts Go” by Whitney Houston
-“Pour Some Sugar on Me” by Def Leppard replaces “Look Away” by Chicago

1989 -“Express Yourself” by Madonna (and any other song) replaces “Like a Prayer” by Madonna
-“Cherish” by Madonna replaces “Toy Soldiers” by Martika
-“Sowing the Seeds of Love” by Tears for Fears replaces “When I See You Smile” by Bad English

Napoleon of Birds
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July 11, 2023 11:39 am
Reply to  LinkCrawford

It’s just Link’s chart, it’s just Link’s chart…

LinkCrawford
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July 11, 2023 11:57 am

Ha! Yeah. Don’t worry…my rejected songs are still allowed to go to #2.

Napoleon of Birds
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July 11, 2023 11:37 am

I’ll preface this with a suggestion: 1958 and 1959 get tacked onto a 1990s iteration of this feature to bring it closer to a decade (one year short). Thoughts?

On with the show!
1980
Cruisin’ over Do That To Me One More Time
The Rose over Coming Up

1981
Being With You over The One That You Love
Woman over Arthur’s Theme

1982
Gloria over Abracadabra
Open Arms over Ebony and Ivory
Hurts So Good over Up Where We Belong

1983
Thank you, Cashbox! You took the most stacked #1s year ever and somehow made it so much more stacked I had to cut Taco!

The Safety Dance over Maniac
Electric Avenue over Baby, Come To Me
Do You Really Want To Hurt Me over Tell Her About It

1984 (I would complain about the 3-song limit but the year was very low on chart-topping clunkers to start with — also, I like Hello and Ghostbusters)
Purple Rain over Karma Chameleon
I Feel For You over Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go
99 Luftballons over I Just Called To Say I Love You

1985
Raspberry Beret over We Are The World
Material Girl over We Built This City
Easy Lover over Separate Lives (Marilyn Martin has been replaced at Philthy Phil’s side with Philip Bailey)

1986
Typical Male over Sara
Why Can’t This Be Love over The Next Time I Fall
When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going over Stuck With You

1988 (so incredibly easy)
What Have I Done To Deserve This? over Baby, I Love Your Way/Freebird Medley
Pour Some Sugar On Me over Don’t Worry, Be Happy

1989 (not ashamed to say Milli Vanilli was my fourth pick)
Express Yourself over If You Don’t Know Me By Now
Real Love over Rock On (and the injustice is avenged at last!)
Cherish over We Didn’t Start The Fire

Pauly Steyreen
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July 11, 2023 12:51 pm

“…I had to cut Taco.”

 😂 

JJ Live At Leeds
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July 11, 2023 1:07 pm

One last spin;

1980
In
Stevie Wonder – Master Blaster
SOS Band – Take Your Time
Smokey Robinson – Cruisin’

Out – same three
Captain & Tennille – Do That To Me One More Time (and I’ll call the appropriate authorities)
Christopher Cross – Sailing
Kenny Rogers – Lady

1981 – slim pickings. Total agreement with Ozmoe. There’s nothing terrible to get rid of and nothing inspiring on the subs bench.

1982
In
Laura Branigan – Gloria
That one is easy enough. There isn’t anything else that takes my fancy but there’s two I really need to get rid of so for no reason other than its first on your list;
Journey – Open Arms

Out
Paul & Stevie – Ebony & Ivory
Lionel Richie – Truly (horrible)

1983
Yep, this is where it gets tricky
In
Eddy Grant – Electric Avenue
Men Without Hats – Safety Dance
Duran Duran – Union of the Snake

Out
Patti Austin & James Ingram – Baby, Come To Me
Michael Sembello – Maniac
Kenny & Dolly – Islands In The Stream

1984
Ozmoe no!! There’s been so many I’ve agreed with you on but I can’t stand for disposing of Ghostbusters.

In
Nena – 99 Luftballons
Prince – Purple Rain
Chaka Khan – I Feel For You

Out
Stevie – I Just Called To Say I Loved You (thanks Stevie but I’m hanging up now)
Billy Ocean – Caribbean Queen
John Waite – Missing You (not missing you)

1985
In
Madonna – Material Girl
Prince – Raspberry Beret

Out
USA For Africa – We Are The World
Good intentions don’t equal good music
Phil & Marilyn – Separate Lives
So much Phil, one needs to go

1986
In
Billy Ocean – When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going
Van Halen – Why Can’t This Be Love 
Wang Chung – Everybody Have Fun Tonight

Out
Dionne & Friends – That’s What Friends Are For
Peter Cetera & Amy Grant – The Next Time I Fall
Whitney Houston – Greatest Love Of All

1988
In
Pet Shop Boys & Dusty Springfield – What Have I Done To Deserve This?
Def Leppard – Pour Some Sugar On Me

Out
Rick Astley – Together Forever
UB40 – Red Red Wine

1989
In
Madonna – Express Yourself 
Madonna – Cherish 
Tears For Fears – Sowing The Seeds Of Love

Out
Michael Damian – Rock On
New Kids – I’ll Be Loving You Forever
Milli Vanilli – Blame It On The Rain

I thought I had no idea who Wayne Newton was but turns out he’s the singer of Danke Schoen from Ferris Bueller. Still, doesn’t excuse him for ruining Cashbox and ending our fun

Zeusaphone
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July 11, 2023 1:13 pm

Jody Watley does deserve a #1, but it’s “Looking For A New Love” from 1987. Hasta La Vista, Baby, to Los Lobos if it was up to me.

“Dancing In The Dark” is terrible and should not be a #1. It’s the worst song on that album and I always skip it when I relisten.

stobgopper
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July 11, 2023 4:20 pm
Reply to  Zeusaphone

Re: ‘Dancing in the Dark.’ That’s often the way when the label demands a single.

cstolliver
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July 11, 2023 4:33 pm
Reply to  Zeusaphone

I disagree about “Dancing” (though I readily acknowledge it’s a departure in Bruce’s catalog) but we agree completely on “Looking for a New Love.”

cappiethedog
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July 11, 2023 5:14 pm
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Blinded by the Light is practically telling my story. I was aware of “Hungry Heart” via AM radio, but I remember being similarly galvanized by “Dancing in the Dark”, just like the protagonist who lives on an island. “Hungry Heart” didn’t make me buy The River.

“Dancing in the Dark” is such a blissfully happy song, its afterglow helped turn what otherwise would have been album tracks or low-charting singles into top ten smashes, even “I’m Going Down”.

“Dancing in the Dark” is the difference between Springsteen being a superstar and Bob Seger.

Zeusaphone
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July 11, 2023 6:51 pm
Reply to  cappiethedog

I don’t see “Dancing In The Dark” as a happy song at all. The joyful sounding music actively works against the desperation of the lyrics.

My interpretation of the song is probably different from yours, though. Few people agree with me that the protagonist of the song is a sex worker who’s not as young or pretty as he once was and thus is having a hard time getting clients. The verses are his internal monologue while the chorus is his sales pitch to a prospect.

cappiethedog
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July 11, 2023 9:22 pm
Reply to  Zeusaphone

I’m listening to the Lucy Dacus version.

Your interpretation has merit.

So in the original version, you’re saying that Springsteen took on the persona of an aging prostitute without anybody noticing?

I’m a big fan of reading against the grain.

You totally ruined the song for me, though…LOL…

Zeusaphone
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July 11, 2023 9:54 pm
Reply to  cappiethedog

Sure, and since there are no gendered pronouns he could be playing a man or a woman and his prospect could also be either. “This gun’s for hire” suggests the protagonist is male, but it’s not a sure thing.

Phylum of Alexandria
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July 11, 2023 3:59 pm

Justice for Taco!

Napoleon of Birds
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July 11, 2023 4:00 pm

Man doesn’t even have a Tom rating.
(Should I… should I enquire on Twitter? I would rather do that for Safety Dance, but if there’s enough momentum I might.)

stobgopper
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July 11, 2023 4:15 pm

Across the decade in 4 songs (sorry, Oz):

‘Take Your Time’ –> ‘It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me’
One of the last great disco songs, before the genre was destroyed by outside forces, only to reemerge, Hydra-like, as many different styles and fashions vs. Joel’s uncanny valley of a new wavy rocker.

‘Everybody Have Fun Tonight’ –> ‘Next Time I Fall in Love’
Not many more joyful songs than ‘EHFT’ vs. bloodless ballad from Cetera, who hasn’t done anything memorable since mid-career Chicago, and Grant, who’s for better or worse, richer or poorer, Christian or Agnostic, Amy Grant.

‘Purple Rain’ –> ‘When Doves Cry’
A mission statement vs. a meh funk number that had (vapors!) no bass. If it makes you feel better, just switch the chart histories.

‘Pour Some Sugar on Me’ –> ‘Greatest Love of All,’ ‘Live to Tell,’ ‘On My Own,’ ‘There’ll Be Sad Songs,’ ‘Holding Back the Years,’ and ‘Invisible Touch’
Stripper, hair metal, and mega-overproduced song nonpareil vs. oh, let’s see, yes, a run of no. 1s of which no one would have blinked an eye had they not reached the top.

cstolliver
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July 11, 2023 4:36 pm
Reply to  stobgopper

Right with you on the first one; it’s fun to see your rationales on the others.

Re: Amy Grant. She’ll be showing up on this site down the line…

Edith G
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July 11, 2023 4:40 pm

Great series . I don’t know why the site sent me back to Home while I was writing, but I can say 84, 85 and 88 were harder to choose so I take all the songs from those years. I’ll write later my options for the rest of the years.

Edith G
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July 12, 2023 11:01 am
Reply to  Edith G

Better late than never:

1980: “Take Your Time” (I have an irrational love for this one).
1981: “Woman”.
1982: “Gloria”.
1983: “Do You Really Want To Hurt Me” and “The Safety Dance”.
1986: “When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going” and “Everybody Have Fun Tonight”.
1989: “Express Yourself”, “Cherish” and “Sowing The Seeds Of Love”.

mjevon6296
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July 11, 2023 6:48 pm

Thanks for all this Ozmoe. It is so much fun, I will stop lurking and participate.

As a “teen of the 80’s”, I was surprised how hard it was to find 80’s Billboard number ones to get rid of. Also, I am adding a “I like / I will defend” section for certain Billboard number ones.

1980

In
Master Blaster

Out
Do That To Me One More Time (please do not)

I Like/I Will Defend
Sailing (so beautiful and peaceful)
A Woman in Love (something about the cadence in the chorus)

1981

In
Elvira (but what a great earworm/novelty!)

Out
The One That You Love

I Like/I Will Defend
Stars of 45 (gateway drug to real Beatles!)

1982

In
Open Arms
Gloria

Out
Maneater (I love my H&O but not this one)
Truly (I have found I do not like LR so much)

I Like/I Will Defend
Chariots of Fire (some odd songs are just meant to have a moment)

1983

In
Do You Really Want to Hurt Me
Electric Avenue
Safety Dance

Out
Islands in the Stream
Say Say Say
Flashdance…What a Feeling (just does not do it for me)

1984

In
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (how was this NOT a number one?)
I Feel for You (yeah, I had the opening part memorized…and can still do it)
Purple Rain

Out
Hello
I Just Called to Say I Love You (please do not)
Missing You

1985

In
Easy Lover (did we sing “She’s a sleazy mother” instead in High School? Yes, yes we did.)
Rasberry Beret (okay, my son loved this one when he was little)

Out
Say You, Say Me (sorry again LR)
Heaven

I Like/I Will Defend
We Built This City (so catchy and again some songs were meant to be a hit in their time)

1986

In
Everybody Have Fun Tonight (there is a resturant near us called Hang Fung – yes, I do sometimes sing “everybody Hang Fung tonight” as the family drives by it)
Why Can’t This Be Love (I was getting older and I just loved this song)

Out
Ther’ll Be Sad Songs (Mr Ocean, please meet Mr. Ritchie)
Live To Tell

Odd Note
in college, did I sing “Next Time I Fall in Love” with McGruff the Crime Dog’s voice instead of Cetara’s? Yes, yes I did.

1988

In
What Have I Done to Deserve This

Out
Get Out of My Dreams, Get Into My Car (no and put that candy away)
OR Look Away (has it come the this, Chicago?)

I Like/I Will Defend
Kokomo (the 80’s were the time when Legacy acts could still have a comback hit. Despite Mike Love’s involvement, I still listen when it comes on)
Don’t Worry, Be Happy (yes, a novelty song if there ever was one but so catchy)

1989

In
Express Yourself
Sowing the Seeds of Love (I do not know if it deserves it but I just like it)

Out
Toy Soldiers
Rock On

I Like/I Will Defend
Batdance
all of Milli Vanilli’s hits (they were so catchy. Someone sang and played and produced the songs and those folks were talented.)

mt58
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July 11, 2023 7:52 pm
Reply to  mjevon6296

Hello and good welcome to you, !

Thanks for de-lurking!

cappiethedog
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July 12, 2023 12:32 am
Reply to  mjevon6296

Your 1980 takes are great.

I like Christopher Cross’ s/t as much as Devo’s Freedom of Choice. “Sailing”, to me, sounds like the highest achievement in soft rock. Oh, gosh. I actually wrote that on a public forum. Also “Woman in Love” is the only Barbara Streisand song that I love. Too bad there isn’t video of her recording the vocal. It’s a great performance.

cappiethedog
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July 11, 2023 10:08 pm

1980: Longer over Lady
1981: Woman over Physical
1982: Gloria over Ebony and Ivory
1983: Mr. Roboto over Maniac
1984: Girls Just Want to Have Fun over Caribbean Queen
1985: Material Girl over Miami Vice Theme
1986: Everybody Have Fun Tonight over Invisible Touch
1987: (Write-in vote: Somewhere Down That Crazy River over Mony Mony)
1988: What Have I Done to Deserve This over Roll with It
1989: Sowing the Seeds of Love over Wind Beneath My Wings

1983 was tough, Ozmoe. “The Safety Dance” has the superior music video. Off-screen, some Wicker Man-like malevolency is taking place in that village

R.S.Wonham
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July 11, 2023 11:07 pm

Reviewing choices, there were a number of audible gasps (primarily in the comments). Partner came into the room to ask if I was OK. I’ll limit my choices to one per year. And MEGA thanks to Ozmoe for entertaining this musical geek. As much of a joyride as Countdowner polls and DeGritter posts on FB!!! Wot!?!

1980 – Smokey’s Cruisin’ in/Kenny Roger’s Lady out
1981 – Smokey Robinson Part Deux w/ You outs annoyingly chirpy voiced Kevin Cronin/REO’s Keep On Loving You
1982 – Branigan bests Chariots of Fire (toughest choice, rest in melody Vangelis)
1983 – Safety Dance outs the Police’s EBYT (so tired of hearing this song! See also Sweet Dreams and What’s Love Got To Do With It, sorry Tina).
1984- Chaka trounces Karma Chameleon – skip the coming and just go, already!
1985 – Prince’s Beret over Dire Staits’ Brotastic, Money For Nothing
1986 – Wang Chung over Boston’s exciting as canned peas, Amanda
1988 – PSB & Dusty over Expose whose sound meshes Alvin & the Chipmunks and spewing kittens.
1989 – Madge gets her due over Martika’s teen girl playdate of a song!

Bonus Beat: How did I miss Philsy and Marilyn Martin? In goes the Material Girl.

Do That To Me One More Time, and then, Do That To Me One More Time and…repeat 120 times. That’s the DTTMOMT cumulative play count and ranking (weird they are the same) in the RW Tunes Library. I LOVE the song. It was one last hurrah for C&T and is a very fine adult themed tune. I don’t get the mass dislike. See also Air Supply’s The One That You Love and Abracadabra. C&T’s remake of Happy Together from the same album DOES deserve to be pummelled. I, of course, have this album and C&T’s debut is one of the first LPs I purchased, so maybe I am biased.

dutchg8r
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July 14, 2023 12:37 pm

I gotta say, that Top 20 list to open the article is a heck of a list for early 1984! Everything is at least a 7 IMO.

Fun series, interesting to see the #CashboxJustice some of these non-Billboard #1’s got over the years.

Mr. Plow
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July 16, 2023 8:27 am

I’ll try to make this a little less fantasy by limiting the replacements to the songs that were #1 ahead of them.

1980

Crusin’ over Do That To Me One More Time
Since I don’t want to replace Magic or Pink Floyd, that’ll be it for 1980

1981

Being With You over Morning Train
Believe It Or Not over Endless Love

1982

Open Arms over Centerfold
Gloria over Up Where We Belong

1983

Electric Avenue over Flashdance
Safety Dance over Tell Her About It
Union of the Snake over Say Say Say

1984

99 Luftballons and Girls Just Want to Have Fun over Jump
Purple Rain over Carribean Queen
I Feel For You and Wild Boys over Out of Touch

1985
Material Girl over One More Night

1986
When The Going Gets Tough over That’s What Friends Are For
Everybody Have Fun Tomight over Walk Like an Egyptian

1987
None

1988
What Have I Done to Deserve This over Seasons Change
Pour Some Sugar On Me over Hold On To The Nights

1989
Cherish over Girl I’m Gonna Miss You
The Way That You love Me over Blame It On The Rain

Mr. Plow
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July 16, 2023 8:28 am
Reply to  Mr. Plow

Here are the 90’s songs to consider:

1990
Pump Up the Jam
Downtown train (#3)
Two To Make It Right
Dangerous
All I Wanna Do Is Make Love To you
Come Back To Me
Thieves In The Temple (#6)

1991
Here We Go (#3)
Rhythm Of My Heart (#5)
Right Here, Right Now
Can’t Stop This Thing We Started
It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye to Yesterday

1992
Can’t Let Go
Diamonds & Pearls (#3)
Remember The Time (#3)
Tears In Heaven
Bohemian Rhapsody
My Lovin’
Under The Bridge
November Rain (#3)
The Letter (no BB Rank)

1993
Ordinary World (#3)
I’m Every Woman (#4)
I Have Nothing (#4)
Looking Through Patient Eyes (#6)
The River of Dreams (#3)
Just Kickin’ It

1994
Without You (#3)
The Most Beautiful Girl In The World (#3)
Don’t Turn Around (#4)
Any Time, Any Place 

1995
I Know
Water Runs Dry

1996
Missing
Not Gon’ Cry
Sittin’ Up In My Room
I Love You Always Forever
It’s All Coming Back To Me Now

Cash Box ceased production in November 1996

cstolliver
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July 16, 2023 12:31 pm
Reply to  Mr. Plow

The ’90s were much more skewed by the sales-vs.airplay dynamic, as many of the songs you list were huge airplay hits but couldn’t overcome the sales points Billboard factored into its No. 1s.

Keeping Ozmoe’s “no more than 3 in a year” rule in play, I’ll go with:

1990: Downtown Train over Tommy Page’s I’ll Be Your Everything; Thieves in the Temple over NKoTB’s Step by Step; Dangerous over She Ain’t Worth It.

1991: Rhythm of My Heart over You’re in Love; Right Here Right Now over When a Man Loves a Woman; It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday over I Adore Mi Amor.

1992: Diamonds and Pearls over How Do You Talk to an Angel; My Lovin’ (You’re Never Gonna Get It) over I’m Too Sexy.

1993: Ordinary World over Informer; Looking Through Patient Eyes over Freak Me; I’m Every Woman over Weak.

1994: The Most Beautiful Girl in the World over Bump ‘N’ Grind.

1995: I Know over Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman

1996: Easy to pick the songs I’d drop (Tha Crossroads; Un-break My Heart; and How Do U Want It/California Love) but hard to pick the three of those five songs, as I loved them all! Since Celine and Brandy had other number ones, I guess I’d go with Missing, Not Gon’ Cry and I Love You Always Forever.

Thanks, Mr. Plow, for the P.S. to this fun series.

Mr. Plow
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July 16, 2023 6:34 pm
Reply to  cstolliver

I can’t find fault with any pf these selections. All worthy (or unworthy depending on how you look at it).

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