Let’s face it:
Studying abroad in Japan is nothing like…
…or doing a Peace Corps tour in Nepal…
…or riding with a stranger to lodge in a brothel in Syria.
We’re talking about an ultra-modern, ultra-clean city in a wealthy country with an absurdly low crime rate.
When I was living in Tokyo, I didn’t miss much food from home, as I could get almost anything in the city, usually without effort. Meatloaf and cheesesteaks were notable exceptions, but I could still get burgers, pizza, chicken pot pies, blueberry pie, bologna on white bread with sliced cheese, Kit Kats, etc.
Still, despite its many conveniences and amenities:
Life in Tokyo is so different from life in the States, in so many ways.
It’s the little things that stand out. Here are a few.
The first thing I noticed was how quiet people are on public transportation.
When I first arrived at Narita Airport in 2004, we students had to take a limousine bus to a rendezvous point where we would meet our study abroad coordinator. On the bus, the man seated next to me received a call on his phone, and he proceeded to talk in hushed tones.
In my head I was remarking on how polite his behavior was, but once he was finished with his call, the man gave me an embarrassed apology.
It turns out that talking on buses is frowned upon, even whispered conversations!
In fact, all bus drivers announce their stops in gentle whispers, so as not to disturb the passengers. Seems like a perfect recipe for a missed stop due to a nap, but whatever.
After years of taking buses and trains in Philly, I appreciated the change…
…Except, when I didn’t. During our time abroad, my friends and I would get the urge to chat on the train once in a while. We weren’t loud talkers, but we would get weird looks and passive-aggressive clearing of throats to politely suggest that we shut up.
That was another weird thing about my time abroad:
The surrounding culture was one of polite formality, shyness, and indirectness.
This is true to some extent all over Japan, but it’s especially the case in the Eastern “Kantou” region that includes Tokyo.
In Western areas of Japan, people are more upfront about their thoughts and feelings. For instance, I witnessed a pedestrian get clipped by someone on a bicycle when I was visiting Osaka, and they shouted “Hey! That HURT!” in a manner that I found refreshingly American.
In contrast, when something like that happens in Tokyo or Yokohama, the person hit doesn’t shout, or say much at all. They don’t even gripe to bystanders about what happened. More likely they give a quiet “ow,” make an exaggerated gesture of pain in the hopes that the offender notices and feels guilty, and then resume what they had been doing before the incident. Anything beyond that would be rude.
Note that “polite” does not equal warm or kind-hearted. I thankfully met lots of kind people in Tokyo, but there was also plenty of cold politeness and passive aggressive behavior in the stores and on the street.
It was not uncommon for people walking toward me on the sidewalk to see me, and then suddenly cross to the other side of the street. Maybe just in case I was going to rob them at gunpoint? I don’t know. They never explained their actions to me, which is good. Because to do so would be rude.
Given the relative shyness of the typical Tokyo resident, the best way to get people to open up was with the help of alcohol.
We study-abroad students would go to a cheap izakaya (like a gastro pub, or tapas bar, but with Japanese food) and just throw back the drinks. Sometimes a group at another table would notice our loud antics and pop over to say hi.
One time, when my friend and I were heading out, we saw some guys wrestling in the vestibule by the bar entrance. One guy had another pinned down, and he shouted to my friend “get him!” My friend did a dramatic but harmless Pro-Wrestler body slam.
The defeated individual then asked for a high five, and shouted, “Great Power!” You never know what will happen once the inhibitions go down.
Same goes for the all-you-can-drink karaoke rooms. We often had people asking to come into our room and sing along. If you can remember what happened later, it’s a great way to make friends.
Less reliable than drunken camaraderie are the bathrooms in Japan. Bathrooms are always a surprise!
The toilets are typically wonderful. Most units feature heated seats and a “bidet” option that is freaky at first but you really come to appreciate. Others play music to hide the more natural noises.
And some border on futuristic, with control panels straight out of a U.F.O. Those are the worst ones to stumble upon when drunk. “Dear God, which button do I press to get the damn lid up??”
Sometimes, though, the toilets are downright medieval. In more historic or less developed areas, they have traditional-style toilets that are basically just a hole in the floor with some ceramic on top. For guys, it’s typically not an issue—though maybe don’t get adventurous with your food unless you know you’re close to a bathroom with modern toilets. And ladies, maybe just don’t venture into the countryside at all…
Whatever the toilet situation may be, the after-sink situation is another matter!
Some bathrooms have paper towels or drying vents, but plenty of them don’t have anything.
Most Japanese people carry handkerchiefs with them for the purpose of drying their hands in the bathroom. When I lived in Tokyo, I soon caught on and did the same.
But now every time I visit, I forget about such quirks, and inevitably I leave the bathroom to resume my affairs with hands still dripping.
Oh, Japan. Land of convenience.
And little rules – just to keep you guessing.
More to come later!
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Given the norms of their public transportation, I would imagine it’s harrowing for a Japanese visitor here the first time they take a shuttle from the airport.
Yeah, it’ll be a non-stop succession of shocks…particularly if they have to land in Chicago O’Hare! 😀
Nowadays, the flight itself must be a shock, since Japanese residents are still wearing masks everywhere. Should they board a plane full of Americans, they’ll be thinking: “what chaos is this??”
I’ve taken some of my more curious friends all around Philly and NYC, and sometimes I wonder if they truly grappled with how much less safe certain areas were compared to Tokyo. I would try to communicate it in a way that could engender caution without blowing the situation out of proportion, but that’s tricky to do across language and cultures.
Also, maybe they couldn’t really perceive what they never experienced. Like the dodo approaching human hunters with curiosity, perhaps people born into safe environments can’t understand such risk unless they learn themselves. Thankfully, no such learning moments occurred on my watch!
Fascinating stuff. I like what you say that polite doesn’t necessarily equate to kind. I wonder if once they get into the security of their own home do they unload about all of the little injustices they encountered that day or the rude foreigners that didnt understand the rules and insisted on whispering on the bus?
Seems that in the west there’s such a focus on mental health and dealing with your feelings rather than hiding them whereas Japanese society appears so formalised that feelings must never be displayed in public – other than the passive aggressive look or cough. Not saying that’s a worse way to be, just very different.
More likely, they bottle up their feelings without ever really dealing with them. As I said, Western Japan is a little different, so maybe they’ll vent or kvetch to others about their day. And younger generations are a bit more open than older ones. But in general, it’s much more repressive than what we’re used to, much more about group harmony than it is about individual interests.
You need to “read the air,” as they say. People who can’t pick up on the subtle signals and needs of others are said to be “kuuki yomenai” (can’t read the air), or “kei uai” (KY!) for short. My wife was often called KY, which is perhaps one reason we found each other. 😄
Based on what you said it seems like drunkeness is acceptable – at least in karaoke bars if not being inebriated in the street. Is that just the preserve of the young or Western Japan or is there a big drinking culture? With how formalised other aspects of the culture appear it seems out of place or is it OK as long as its done in the right manner?
Is there a clubbing or bar culture outside the karaoke bars?
The drinking culture is not as strong as some countries, like Ireland, Russia, or even South Korea. But there’s plenty of drinking to be had.
Yeah, there’s a healthy bar and club culture. And near any train station at night, there’s gonna be some risk of a drunken salaryman puking in the street (still beats the dudes in Paris pissing on the streets in broad daylight). Usually the rules have some sanctioned exceptions, and I guess one of them is: Better to puke your guts up than wake your neighbors up with rowdy shouts.
Clubs and bars are far less rowdy than they often are in the US, and far less about dudes grinding up on women than about people having a fun time. I’d say that they’re more prudish about sex, but their marketplace says otherwise. 😉 It’s more that they’re very private about it; even holding hands in public is a big deal for a lot of couples.
Because of pixelation, they invented a whole new genre, which seems far, far, far worse.
They get around the 2014 law.
I like the honesty of Nagisa Oshima.
He was a good egg…so to speak.
For reference, here is an example of a daunting toilet control panel.
And a sleek one:
“Press the button to flush.” Which button?
Funnily enough, one of the two buttons on top. Far left is big flush, second one is small flush. So yeah, even the English provided doesn’t help much.
😳 *gulp*
It’s like a smart thermostat in someone’s house. If only…
” Siri, flush generously please”
That’s frightening. Push the wrong button and your soul gets sucked into the black square and spend an eternity watching other people use the toilet.
Good lord, reminds me of the old joke about the guy who went into the futuristic ladies room and pressed the button marked “T. R.”… didn’t turn out so well for him.
This is the kind of travel info that should be priority one for all travelers – the variety of cultural shock differences. It would cut down drastically on Ugly Tourist stereotypes for Americans certainly who have the “this is my universe” mindset. Even within the States itself – I hated driving down to Disney and the Universal Studios area when I lived in Orlando because all the tourists in rental cars are totally in their own world, freaked out driving in an area that’s unfamiliar, Brits trying to sort out the whole driving on the right thing…. The scenic route on back roads was the safer bet.
Bidets in public restrooms? Yeah, that could never happen here in the US. Those bidet options would be used for every possible thing except for their intended purpose!
Reminded me of my first encounter with strange toilets. Went to Norway in 1996, into Oslo’s old Airport. Both my friend and I needed to make a pit stop, but we couldn’t find the bathrooms in the terminal. Eventually realized it was a single entity out amongst the seating, like those family bathrooms, just 1 oversized room. Ok, obstacle 1 overcome – toilet found. I go in first, let nature do its thing, go to flush and – uhhh, where’s the handle? The toilet seat has an automatic feeder to rotate a sanitary cover on the seat so you don’t need to fuss with individual covers. The only button I could find that might be the flusher turned out to be this seat cover thing, so all I wind up doing is spooling this auto seat cover round and round and round…..
So meantime, my friend is outside the door waiting. She starts banging the door wondering why I’m taking so long, she’s gotta go and we have no idea where the next bathroom is in the terminal. I’m yelling back at her “I can’t find the damn flusher, I feel like a total loser moron at the moment!” The only other thing I saw on the toilet was a knob on top of the tank. I’m pushing on this knob, turning it, everything but the most obvious action – pull up. Eventually I give that a try, and voila, success, we have a flush!
My friend was basically dancing in place when I finally emerged, so I was like – you’re welcome, you gotta pull the top knob up to flush, lol. I honestly thought it was some Viking Punk’d thing, like if you can’t figure out how to use their toilet, don’t bother visiting Norway. Just get back on the plane and return to where you came from…. 🙃
Yeah, I try not to be an obnoxious tourist, and certainly try not to be a timid one either. No point traveling across the world only to hide in a bubble.
But there’s no better way to bring out the inner timid tourist than to have an inscrutable bathroom system!
Ah yes, and as for France; so chic, so stylish, so why the hell is the toilet a hole in the ground with placings for feet, over which you crouch and aim and hope for the best?!?!
I don’t know if these are still commonplace but I found a couple of these in motorway service stations around 20 years ago. Just thankful I didn’t need a number 2.
Thankfully I didn’t encounter those in Paris, but that’s basically what I meant by the “other” type of toilets in Japan. Sometimes you get lucky and have a bar to hold onto. Otherwise it’s a game of balance and careful aiming. 😬
That is the luxury version. For a more basic and nerve wracking toilet experience this is how the French roll.
Are you kidding me???? That looks like a game of Cornhole.
Now Cornhole makes a lot more sense….😆
Cornhole you say? A new one on me. Maybe i won’t Google it if that toilet brings it to mind 😂
Fear not. It’s pretty wholesome.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornhole
I’ve seen pix of “toilets” in China. They make this one look luxurious.
And … let’s just say I like privacy and comfort when I’m in the WC. I would probably get all kinds of digestive tract infections from holding my bladder and sphincter in these places.
I subscribe to a YouTube channel called Matt and Julia. He’s British, she’s Russian, and they travel constantly, working from wherever home is this week. In their latest video, they take a day trip to a village outside Yakutsk in Siberia where it’s current -50°C. I’ve cued it up to where they visit the village “bathroom.”
https://youtu.be/VEcKdbGXZp4?t=978
mt58 sneaks away from his real life for a quick check on his mobile, for today’s status at the tnocs.com website.
“Ok, how nice. Looks like we might have a lot of comments on Phylum’s newest article, Lemme check…”
“Wha…”
“GARY! QUICK! LOCK DOWN THE FILE SERVER!”
“I THINK WE’VE BEEN HACKED!”
“THERE’S LIKE A DOZEN PICTURES OF TOILETS IN THE COMMENTS!”
Last week – “whoo’s”
This week – loo’s
Next week – ??
Last week it was whoos.
This week it’s Japanese loos.
Next is kangaroos.
I apologise. What can I say? It got out of hand and I’ll keep the toilet humour to a minimum now. Or we’ll save any further pictures for a future article on toilets of the world. You won’t believe what they do in Finland 🙈
Breaking news: Water Closet Industry Monthly just called. They want to place a banner ad.
“Finally. Pinch me. An actual sponsor.”
“Bring on the latrines.”
Ha! That sounds like something my sister would have loved when she was a kid; she had an odd habit of remembering all our family road trips based on the rest areas we’d stop at along the travels.
And dear lord JJ, do not ever apologize for toilet humor. Or apologise for toilet humour. Whichever. It’s all craptastic.
We were just taking the piss. 😀
This comment is brought to you by Toto Washlet.
There is an entry to be written about “toilets around the world.”
I am not the person to write it, for various reasons. You would click away if I shared my experience in an Argentinian soccer stadium where I got a sudden case of “Peron’s revenge.”
Fun article!
We tend to be a fairly music-oriented website. Ever heard of the industrial musical? It used to be popular for companies to put on professionally written/performed mini-musicals for their employees at conventions and the like. Here’s a beauty of a number from the American Standard musical from sometime in the 1960s. Folks, I present the most sincere song of all time about a bathroom: “My Bathroom”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKSe5ZKBcZc
“Making faces at my face”
That’s either stupid or brilliant. I go with brilliant.
Such a strange world we live in.
Clearly, someone has laced my coffee with some kind of hallucinogenic.
This can’t be real.
Maybe you used the wrong cream in your coffee, mt. Your bathroom is where you should be free to cream.
That sentence is just all kinds of wrong. 😂
Link, you just gave yourself the topic of your next article. I’d love to hear more about these industrial musicals. This, is, fantastic!
I’d like to think the songwriter was giving us an open door with such an obvious line “I’m Free”…. I’m free to use every possible connotation of the number one rhyme for my own entertainment.
Given that I’ve been trying to chronicle the broad history of industrial music on my blog, I’m embarrassed to say that I had never heard of it until yesterday.
I know these industrial musicals exist, but this is the only one that I’ve heard. You are into these, Phylum? You should write this article! 🙂
What I’m hearing is interesting, but I’m just learning about industrial musicals.
My blog covers “industrial music” in absurdly broad terms, from the polyphonic compositions of the early industrial revolution to dark, transgressive industrial metal.
This could be a possible chapter, but I’d have to get more acquainted with it. Maybe that’s where your article comes in! 😉
I get it. Industrial musicals definitely are not the same as industrial music. 😄
Can’t find it, but there was an episode of King of the Hill, in which Hank, Bobby, and Luanne go on tour, performing musical numbers promoting propane and propane accessories. That show was brilliant. To me, it had the nuance of an indie film. That “cartoon” had a tone.
Wow!!!
There’s a whole rabbit hole of them to go down. Thought this one was gonna be problematic but it’s not what you think, the harem is the selection of motor graders. Some stunning lyrical work.
https://open.spotify.com/track/4QGF1HlgW3zL7yKSOmUi3l?si=VnlfBLA0T2ark5z6O4q89A
It’s my understanding that companies would get the top notch writers and performers during their “off season” to make extra ca$h.