The Novelty Is Wearing Off, 60s Edition! A Baker’s Dozen +1 of The Oddest Songs In UK Chart History

No other decade demonstrates the transition of generational power better than the 60s.

That applies for novelty records too. The gap between the early decade releases and those later on is massive. Though starting with this mid decade effort suggests not everyone was moving forward to a new era:

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Clog wearing, dancing mice complete takeover of a windmill in Old Amsterdam. How lucky they are, they continually remind us. 

Amsterdam does have a particular set of attractions. Not ones that a burgeoning family of mice should be partaking in though. Or maybe that’s why they’re so happy. 

This was the last of Ronnie’s 18 top 40 hits. Which apparently overshadowed everything else he did and became something of a millstone for him. The perils of recording a novelty right there. Mike Batt should have paid attention. 

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Delivered with a nod and a wink.

Benny would become one of the biggest TV stars of the 70s and 80s. There’s a particular trope of the British seaside resort with picture postcards featuring lurid animation, suggestive situations and saucy double entendre. Benny’s comedy was this brought to life.

He’d have a #1 hit with “Ernie (The Fastest Milkman In The West)” in 1971 but this was his chart debut and already came replete with not so subtle sexual references. 

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You might recognise the piano.

In the 50s they had Steinway adapt it to produce ‘an old time bar room sound.’ This entailed using lacquer to harden the hammers and detuning some of the strings. Although Lieutenant Pigeon didn’t use this piano it has echoes in “Mouldy Old Dough.”

It became known as the ‘Mrs. Mills Piano,’ having been her instrument of choice when recording. 

Mrs. Mills (Gladys) was 43 when she made her chart debut with this. Her act was a reminder of the past at a time when progress was picking up speed. 

Despite being discovered when entering middle age, she managed to knock out around 40 albums through the 60s and 70s before her death in 1978.  She might be largely lost to history, but her legacy lives on through the piano.

As a special treat, a clip of Gladys performing. It might not be my kind of music but just look at the delight on her face as she plays. 

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It really is a record of two halves.

• There’s the bits when Sophia is singing in her alluring voice, be still my beating heart indeed. Not even the fact she’s saying ‘boompitty boom’ can detract from the effect.

• Then there’s Peter Sellers putting on an Indian accent. Which should dampen any ardour created by sultry Sophia. 

It’s George Martin’s fault. 

Sellers and Loren were starring together in The Millionairess. As producer of Sellers comedy records, George commissioned this song for the soundtrack. Which the film makers rejected. 

Not on the grounds of good taste, mind. Given that it had Sellers playing an Indian doctor, that ship had long sailed. They made the record anyway and got a big hit out of it.

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Sellers again, with a less problematic Beatles connection. 

It comes from a 1965 TV special; The Music Of Lennon & McCartney, with a range of performers celebrating their songwriting skills. 

This is “A Hard Day’s Night” performed in the manner of Laurence Olivier playing Shakespeare’s Richard III. A much more acceptable use of Sellers skills.

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Obviously: The Beatles were fertile ground for covers and cash ins. 

This one has the disconnect of 41 year old Dora, established star of stage and screen in comedy and serious roles, playing the role of adolescent Beatles fanatic. The vocals are delivered in a theatrical music hall style.

She’s not fussy, any of them will do. After all, ‘they’re all the same’. The Beatles apparently approved of it playing a version of it within days of its release for their BBC Radio Christmas show.

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Newley had quite the career.

He transitioned from child actor to adult star of TV, Film and music. He had two #1 singles early in 1960 with typical of their time pop. It seems he became a bit bored at this point.  

He created and starred in TV comedy; The Strange World Of Gurney Slade, that did badly in the ratings but was way ahead of its time.

In one episode he’s put on trial for not being funny enough in the preceding episodes. The 60s weren’t yet swinging, recreational drugs were yet to be invented, Britain wasn’t ready for this. 

“Strawberry Fair” came out at the same time as Gurney Slade. It was a lot more successful but still self indulgent. Its an old folk song delivered at a gallop. He starts off respectful but after a while the effort is too much. His telling goes awry and he again breaks the fourth wall, rather than repeating the same lyrics he tells the listener “well, you know how it goes”. 

If that wasn’t enough, the following year he released a swing version of “Pop Goes The Weasel.”

He did knuckle back down to it, though. Come 1963 he was married to Joan Collins and was winning a Grammy with songwriting partner Lesley Bricusse for “What Kind Of Fool Am I?” 

After that there was film directing, writing musicals, as well as providing the songs for the 1971 Willy Wonka film. 

And in case you’re thinking his voice sounds so familiar:

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It literally is The Highway Code. Delivered acapella in the style of an Anglican church chant. Perhaps this should be assigned to all learner drivers. 

The Master Singers were teachers at Abingdon School – hence: Master. 

Which found its way to the BBC where it was played by Winston Churchill.

Not that Winston Churchill.

From there they found themselves re-recording it with George Martin (he gets around a bit. As hard as the Beatles worked maybe they should have put in a bit more effort to keep him busy) on production duties. 

They followed this up with The Shipping Forecast which charted at #50. George Martin also came up with the idea of recording them singing the telephone directory. Which may have been a gag to far but thanks to petty bureaucracy (and copyright) they weren’t allowed to.

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By the late 60s rock was taking itself very seriously. One way of showing that off was to borrow from the classical world. 

Love Scultpure are a Welsh blues rock band, with this single providing the first commercial success for Dave Edmunds. 

The Sabre Dance is borrowed from Gayane, a 1940s ballet from Russian composer; Aram Khatchaturian. Love Sculpture give it the full power trio blues rock treatment, speeded up and full of self-importance.

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The Beatles influence yet again. This time it’s George (not Martin) helping out his friends down at the temple by producing this recording of the traditional Hare Krishna Mantra. It does exactly what it says on the label. 

You’ll soon pick up the lyrics. The chant is hammered home to the point that it will never leave you.

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On one hand, I want to be gracious about this.

• It appears to have been written and recorded with complete sincerity.
• But that sincerity just adds to the ‘wow’ factor.

As in; “Wow, That’s Bad.” 

It grabs the attention from the first line. With plenty more of that to come. It’s difficult to pick out a favourite but its not often a song lyric makes me laugh out loud as this one did;

It’s quite something to hear for the first time waiting for the penny to drop as to what ‘the deal’ is. Death ballads have long been popular but this one really goes to an unexpected place. Perhaps it’s unfair of me to include this as every other song is a deliberate attempt at novelty whereas this achieves it inadvertently.

Then again, it really is quite something.

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The premise is that the Knights imagine a scenario where popular beat combos of the time are called up into the armed forces. While performing parodies of those groups and bringing it altogether in a medley. 

So we get The Searchers, Freddie And The Dreamers, The Rolling Stones, The Bachelors, Dave Clark Five and The Beatles getting into various scrapes as they’re signed up and detailed around the world in service of Queen and Country. 

It proved a fruitful option. They carried on in the same vein, with eight top 40 hits, the last of them in 1980 and they were still TV regulars into the 80s and touring into the 2010s.

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This is as straight as it gets for the Bonzos. So it’s worth including the B-side; “Canyons Of Your Mind,” for extra flavour. Plus, that does feature the worst guitar solo in rock. Though the fact that it’s intentionally bad may make it one of the best. 

As the band name suggests, they weren’t taking things too seriously. A mix of trad jazz, rock and pop psychedelia with a surrealist comedy bent. They appeared in Magical Mystery Tour playing their song; Death Cab For Cutie.

The Beatles connection extends to “Urban Spaceman,” which was produced by a certain; Apollo C Vermouth.

This was their only single to chart, they were just too weird for the mainstream. After their split Neil Innes worked with Monty Python, writing the songs for Holy Grail (he’s also the one whistling on “Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life” before creating The Rutles with Eric Idle. 

Next time, its onwards… and backwards…

To the 1950s – And the beginning of the chart age.

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