When In Rome? Punt.

… and their entourages.

Pray, sit you down, dear Tornadus,
And, with no further stay, brocade
The sluggardly masses with tales and augury
Of the skittish Colts and their recent trade
Among the austral quartet who lie alee
In the ancient and revered AFC

Ah, fair Indianapolis, fixed
At the axis of Amerigo’s namesake
Landmass, hath stay’d progress
Or mayhap moved retrograde
King Irsay the Younger doth spat
Fierce tirades and no little wind
Without avail; Lord Taylor cries for coin
And yea, merits recompense for his toil;
In all the land, his exploits cradling
Yon treasured hogshead see no compeer
Yet he squats among the soily grubs

Polvolius:
‘Tis a snarl not easily sorted
The King’s attendants pule and mutter
Their reputation resideth with that of
Newts and worms, lower yet than phantoms
That dire tread in dread Hades, or Dallas

Tornadus:
Gainsay me not, bold Polvolius!
The starred warriors, sumptuously
Housed in the embrace of genius Jones
Did, at the close of yonder season
Achieve the playoff goal; the Colts, nay;
Left unsaddled, unbridled, unshod

Polvolius
Oh, true, so true. Yet, an unworked jewel
As tall Richardson, albeit a swaddled babe
Upon the field of discord and pad
Where the fear’d two-high defense lurks,
May cause the Hoosier flock to dream
Of dominion o’er the ruddy South
And glory to the azure and godly white
Is it not so?…

Tornadus
…It may be, or not
‘Tis a riddle and a knotty obstacle
To answer and thereby overcome
I fear a wearisome age will pass en largo
Princes will rise and popes depart
Seas boil and the aeried crags themselves
Thrown down to dry and dead dust
Before that hallowed hour arriveth

Polvolius:
By the by, I am enamored of Buckner,
The mountainous Nelson and quick Pittman.
Yet beyond this illustrious triad,
Naught but pups of no impress’d sinew
Master Shane, newly crowned, is enjoined
With heavy labors upon his unwizened brow
I do not begrudge him the monstrous task

Tornadus:
Pfft! He will have gold to ease his troubles
If he not don the chaplet of Victory
Always color commentation beckons
And at the least, troubled Titans and Texans
Brook no overlarge trial-

(A sennet sounds)

It is said he wishes
To alter the broadcast rights once more